Thursday, September 28, 2006

733

According to bloglines hat's the number of blog entries I'm behind in reading. Needless to say most of them I'll be skipping and it makes me sad. I can't remember the last time I went on a blog tour. I have 50 feeds that I follow which with the help of bloglines I managed to keep up on fairly easy. Since I've started on the net I've never had so little online time before. (well except when I went a month without a computer). It seems like the world is just passing me by. Although I know it's not really.

Even when I do have the time I find myself waiting in line for my turn on the computer. Drew's computer is down for the count so it's only this one now. Add in the fact that Michelle's boyfriend is away to school and has no phone right. Their main communication is IM'ing at night when he can borrow someone's computer. Then there's homework assignments online and research needed for projects. I WANT ANOTHER COMPUTER!!!!

I joke that I need a laptop so I can go to the mall and use their WIFI. I can see it now...me sitting in the food court with glazed over internet eyes, nose stuck to the laptop screen. Danielle sitting in her stroller or a disgusting highchair whining to get out, me throwing cheerios or pretzels at her to appease her for a few more minutes. Oh wouldn't I win the mother of the year award! ;o)

I'm not even suppose to be here now. My house is SCREAMING at me to take care of it. I did manage to get a few things done here before I sat down with my coffee and snack, but it's not nearly enough. I keep thinking we'll make a huge dent in it after dinner but there never seems to be time. Like tonight...there's elementary school open house anbd a youth meeting at church(which my older kids will probably miss).

I knew open house was Thursday but I failed to realize that TODAY was Thursday in my thinking. Poor Jake, he has a science project due tomorrow. He's been waiting for (and bugging) me to hook up the printer so he could finish it. I've been putting it off figuring we'd work on it Thursday night. Now he won't be home until 5:30, has to eat and be back out the door by 6:30 and won't return until after 8. :o( Why would teachers put a deadline the day AFTER a big school function? GRRRR! I feel bad becuase he's always been one of my better self motivated homework doers. It's not a matter of him avoiding it.

Well at least my van is clean! LOL Monday was a beautiful day but the ground was too muddy for Danielle to crawl around. We went for our walk and then hung out in the van. So I had time to clean it AGAIN (did it a week or so ago) How does it get so messy in so short time? I bought a tote to replace my carboard box held together with string. Hopefully that'll make things a lot easier to maintain.

I feel like I've written this post before. Problem is...this is my life right now. Even when I'm not doing something it seems like I'm hurrying up and waiting. Some things have gotten easier, others just keep on keeping on. I just wish my brain would shut off once in a while. All these running thoughts are enough to make me exhausted!

Well my coffee cup is empty and Danielle's done nursing...so back to work! Guess I should start with hooking up the printer.

Saturday, September 23, 2006

A scary and exhausting evening

Today was a busy day although it was quite enjoyable...for a while. This weekend is the fall youth soccer tournament at church. We play different fellowships from all over the Northeast US and Canada. The moms' jobs are to make fools of ourselves as we cheer much too loudly.

It looked to be a normal soccer weekend....WET! Luckily the temperature decided to be nice to us and hovered in the mid 70s. They started playing at 10am with a light rain. By the time lunch time hit at noon it started clearing up and becoming a bit muggy.

During our last regularly scheduled game (quarterfinals were next) I decided to take Danielle for a walk. It was after 2 and she'd been up all day. I thought riding in the stroller over the bumpy gravel would put her to sleep. WRONG! She was too nosey to relax enough to sleep. We got 3/4 away around the outer circle when Danielle started crying.

She was trying to turn around and stand up in the stroller. The whole time she acted like she ate something gross and was trying to spit it out. There were tons of yellow jackets out today so I thought maybe she got stung. I got her out of the stroller and checked her over (even in her mouth) She calmed a bit and I finished our walk carrying her and pushing the stroller. I stopped at a boulder so I could sit and nurse her which she did fine....for a few minutes. Then she started crying again. So we walked some more. I finally got back to where my camp chair was set up amongst the moms watching the game. I nursed Danielle until she fell asleep...or so I thought. She bit me hard while nursing and started SCREAMING! Her face was red, her eyes were puffy and she wouldn't stop.

I took off her clothes to search for a sting, no welts. She did have a few big patches of hives on her upper chest and arms. Her ears and face were beet red and looked puffy. I really couldn't be sure whether it was from crying so hard or not. Her spit was thick and she did the spitting out thing again and then threw up. I kept watching her throat and chest to see if she was having a hard time breathing but she wasn't. My SIL, D, told me she had an epipen in her diaper bag if I needed it.

I couldn't calm her down for anything. She refused to nurse. We left the area and walked. I talked and tried to soothe her. After she threw up I decided this was getting too close to needing medical help and went to my van for my first aid kit and some benedryl. I couldn't find a medicine dropper but found a unopened straw so used that to give her some. She's a terrible medicine taker and fought me tooth and nail. I did manage to get some in her and then she threw up again! So I'm not really sure HOW much she had.

She continued to cry and her face still looked red and puffy. I finally managed to calm her a bit right before we were to eat dinner at 5pm. She sat in my lap while we ate and whined on and off. She was looking a bit better by the end of dinner. I was going to leave at 7 instead of going to the meeting. By 7 she decided she was ok. As time went on she became more active and whined less. Her eyes still looked pretty swollen. Around 9 she even smiled at and played with one of the adults.

She's now sleeping soundly (I think) I feel like I've been playing soccer all day. It totally drained me. I didn't realize it until about 8'ish while sitting in the meeting hall. All I wanted was to crawl into bed and go to sleep! I have NO idea what she had the reaction to and I hope I never find out again!

I'm just hoping she's ok and back to her smiley self tomorrow. At 9:15 starts the semifinals of the tournment. For the first time ever out youth have to play! YEAH THEM!!! Finals are played at 11, then it's lunch. At 2pm we're having my MIL's memorial feast until about 5. Then back home to finish homework and get ready for the week ahead which is looking to be busy at first. Monday I'm driving Michelle to school, have an appt after I pick her up in the afternoon and then a baby shower in the evening.

Friday, September 22, 2006

LF day

You know the drill...My day to post on the largerfamily blog. You're time to click on the link below and see what I had to say.

The current topic is Dealing with Chaos. Welcome to my world!

Remember to visit the dropdown box over there ---> to see a list of all my other posts at LF.

Oh yeah, and feedback is always appreciated. :o)

Thursday, September 21, 2006

Tossin and Turnin

My mind is a whirlwind and I can't sleep. All that keeps running through my head is what I could be doing instead of sleeping. Top of the list is to come here and WRITE! So here I am.

My computer time is at an all time low right now. Not only am I hardly home during the days when the computer is free. We're down to one computer now! Drew's computer is down for the count so we're all sharing mine. Michelle has a class that requires her to take an online quiz after every reading assignment. So that tends to take precidence. Driving Michelle isn't SO bad. Although I can see it getting worse once the weather changes and my options dwindle. (MJ...Michelle doesn't have her license and isn't anywhere near ready to take her road test. So no on giving her the van, as much as I'd love to! LOL)

Monday was a BEAUTIFUL day with tons of sun and temps in the low 80s. After Danielle and I went for a walk we set up camp near the pond. Me in my camp chair with snacks and a book. Danielle with some toys, lots of crawling room and her stroller to take a nap in. If every day was like Monday I'd feel thankful for such a task. It felt like a mini vacation and I was feeling a tad guilty for wasting the day away. I keep debating if it's worth it to stay in the city. Is 3hrs waiting worth the $10 in gas it'd cost me to go home? Would I actually get anything done knowing I had to run back out the door again in a few hours? In the winter I could see me staying in the city, especially since they tend to get less snow then our house does. But now...I'm not so sure.

I'm happy to say that I'm getting a bit more done around the house nowadays. Not that it looks it but things are getting done and the important people know it. I always find I feel better about everything when I get back into the groove of cleaning. Not that I like to clean, just that I feel better.

This weekend the kids finally begged enough to get me to agree to my nieces spending the night. With the crazy summer we had, there wasn't much of a chance for them to spend time out here like they normally do. The oldest was at a friend's house so didn't come so I only had 2 extras. My sister drove them out here and I'm sure she was dumbstruck on the state of the house. When sharing a bedroom we were often referred to Felix and Oscar. Oh well the girls had fun and that's all that matters. I think her oldest wants to come out this weekend, I'm not sure how that'll work out but we'll see.

Tonight was the last soccer practice before the tournament this weekend. Tomorrow (Thurs) night they'll have a youth meeting and pep rally with Friday off. (Although there are activities planned for the adults) I'm hoping without a nightly 7pm deadline (time they need to be at church for practice) we'll be able to do a bit more around here. The kids have been asking me to drive up to the cemetary and visit MIL's grave. We've been wanting to use our rec center membership. The little kids want to go swimming, older ones use the weightroom. Of course there's reading time and practicing spelling that tends to get pushed aside when time's short. Oh yeah and fun time! lol

Pat's still looking for a job. I've put him on notice that he's driving Michelle to Jess's house tomorrow and then going into the other city/suburbs to look for a job. They've had better luck at the hiring agency in that direction then the one out near the college. (where he's already applied and not hear anything from) I'm pretty sure he's feeling the crunch of having empty pockets. He's also dying to get a puppy which Tom won't even entertain the idea of as long as Pat's broke.

Drew's band seems to get more and more calls. September 30th they're playing at a Tex-Mex restaurant/bar. They were suppose to play at a showcase tonight but not sure if they did. Today was Allison's birthday and Drew was spending the day with her. Also last time they played there they didn't get on the stage until midnight. Closing the place down is too late night for school kids!

Carrie had a checkup at the TODAY study. They were really pleased with her glucose numbers and her weight. (which was the same as in July) Her blood pressure was a little off. Her dystolic (upper) number was too high for someone her age. It's the second appt that it's been like that. They rechecked her at the end of the appt and finally got a number that they could relax a bit on. So for now she's pre-hypertensive instead of hypertensive. We're watching sodium intake and trying to get her moving more.

My meds are driving me up the wall. The new one has some side effects that are similar to what I dealt with after having my gall bladder removed. Gas, bloating, and diarrhea. It's supoose to diminish after a while. Also it helps when I stick to my food plan...so there's a motivator. I think it's adverserly effecting my numbers though. Carrie's gotten better numbers then me and she's never done that before! My fastings were in the high 80s and 90s. Now they are in the 106 range. My after meal numbers are just borderline where they were fine before. I'll going to give it another week or so and see what happnes. The only good thing about this is that it may help me lose weight because it blocks the intake of carbs/glucose. I haven't decided if that's worth the adverse effects or not.

Danielle is growing like a weed and keeping us entertained. She's found her screech, much to Tom's chagrin. Her mouth is going constantly. For the most part it's blah lah labaglaba stuff but I hear a word slip out once in a while. She's not walking yet and I'm ok with that. I think she'll be our oldest walker. She's on the verge of doing it, just hasn't gotten bold enough to do it. Once she does though she'll be running!

Her newest ploy is to throw a temper tantrum everytime someone gets in the van without her. We've had the front door open because of the nice temps. She'll make a mad crawl for the front door and watch to see if whoever went out it is getting in the van. If they do she SCREAMS like she's hurt and then puts her head to the floor for just the right dramatic effect. Tuesday it made Pat come running back in to check on her...Then carry her out to her carseat for a ride to pick up Michelle with him. Naaaaah she's not spoiled! I'm SO in trouble!

The kids seem to be adjusting well to school. They all seem to be self motivated to do their homework and studying. It's a first! Especially for Carrie. I still have to prompt at times when time is short but all in all they've got it down. :oD Eileen was SO proud of herself on Friday when she brought home a 95% on her first spelling test! She has 10 regular words and 10 sight words on each test, double the amount from last year. They aren't all in the same word family like last year either. I was really worried she'd get overwhelmed by it. She scored better then any pretest I'd given her at home!

The new bedroom arrangments seem to be working out well too. I've noticed that Liz and Carrie are spending more one on one time now. I'm sure they really appreciated having their room to themselves on Saturday. I woke up at 7:30am to find the little girls and niece playing Barbies. They'd gone to bed after midnight! They were dragging around dinner time to say the least. lol

Well I've rambled long enough. My eyes are finally realizing it's late and we need some sleep. I've been missing coming here and visiting my blog friends. I haven't gone on a proper blog tour in weeks! Hopefully I'll have time soon. I hope everything is well with everyone out there.

Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Only have a sec

I'm not handling driving Michelle and the kids going back to school well right now. My house is a mess, dinners have been not so great, and we're totally unprepared in the mornings. It doesn't help that I was barely home this weekend so I couldn't play catch-up. It doesn't help that Danielle has hardly been napping and has no one to pay attention to her but me. It doesn't help that the big church soccer tournament is in 2wks. The kids are having big time soccer practices every night ontop of their regular church things. It doesn't help that I haven't been sleeping well and am exhausted during the day.

I thought our new chorelist would help. Things are so bad they can't take care of it in the short time they have at night. I'm trying to get them to chip at it every day but it doesn't seem to be effective. I need to get organized!!!! Planning meals before hand, getting laundry done and outfits planned ahead of time so we're not searching for something every morning.

I hate to say it but....I NEED a schedule! Waaahhhhh! Snack time, chore time, homework time, dinner time, running out the door time, BED time!

On the plus side. Monday after dropping off Michelle, Danielle and I went for a walk. Danielle fell asleep and I was able to sit in the shade a read a book! I haven't read a book in a while. Right now I've just started the Red Tent. I've been tempted to run out and bring it in the house but I know that's not smart. If I did that then I'd get absolutely nothing done. So it's a Mon and Wed read only.

I mentioned this weekend was busy. Here's the highlights...

Fri night... Drew's band played at a "block party". They set up outside one of the bandmember's house and had a nighttime concert. We were there from 8-11.

Sat... The first of our church's youth got married!!! She was BEAUTIFUL! The ceremony was touching and the feast afterwards was uplifting. The girls and I got home about 9'ish. After Tom and I went to bed we ended up starting to talk. We were a bit shocked to see the clock say 4AM! Tom decided he wanted a snack so we got back up. Danielle woke up and I climbed back into bed between 4:30 and 5.

Sun...Tom's work called at 7:30am!!!! Wouldn't you know it I couldn't get back to sleep. I was zombie all day. We went to church at 11 and stayed for lunch. Afterwards we tried to finish up school shopping. We got home about 9pm.

Other notes... Drew's band has been asked to play at quite a few places lately. They're really excited and have even been paid for some of them. 2 wks ago they played at a wedding and a benefit. This weekend was a Founder's Day celebration on Saturday and a benefit on Sunday. Tonight they're playing at a bar.

Well since this is still sitting here open since 9:30 this morning...I'll update.

I went to the OB today :o( It was a little rough sitting there and affected me a bit more then I thought it would. I was asked what I'm going to do now and said....proceed as normal...whatever that is. lol Everything checked out ok. My weight was the same as it was at my last appointment. My blood pressure was 106/80. I have NO idea how she always gets such unbelieveably low numbers like that. My glucose numbers while acceptable weren't really where he wants them. (I thought they were good and I my A1C is only 5.1!!!!) So I'm back on glucophage and he's added acarbose. I'm also back on my non pg high blood pressure meds. We wants me back in in 2mos. I'm hoping I may need to go in before that. :o)

Friday, September 08, 2006

My turn again....

It's my Friday over at Largerfamilies.com.

The topic is making your kids feel special. Run on over and read my post...I'm her favorite!

Thursday, September 07, 2006

Carrie's birth story

Her stats...

Carolyn Marie
September 7, 1994
1:31pm
8lbs 7oz

I found out I was pg when Luke was 10mos old. I was due on Labor Day (Sept 5th). I went to my OB's office for the first time when I was 10wks along. Unfortunately for me I was assigned to the OB from hell! She was only there for a year and for that I am THANKFUL! She micromanaged everything and drove me (and the lab ladies) crazy. My blood pressure was a little high at my first appointment but was fine most of the pregnancy until near the end. BUT because of that one high reading the OB insisted I had chronic hypertension...not pregnancy induced hypertension. I suggested maybe the inital high reading was due to nerves but was poo-poo'ed.

Due to her thinking of Chronic hypertension she had me doing lab work everytime I turned around. The lab ladies hated to see me coming since the OB ordered them to do EVERY test they could. According to the lab techs there was no need to do them all and she was the only dr that ever did that. I failed my 1 and 3hr GTT at 26wks and was put on a GD diet. My sugar numbers never went high while on the diet and monitoring it.

Starting at 34wks the dr decided weekly dr visits wasn't enough and I needed more monitoring. I had to do weekly NST and biophysical workups. My blood pressure started creeping up at 36wks. I decided to be crazy and camped in a tent with all the kids at our church's annual summer conference when I was 37wks. After a few days I had one of the nurses check my pressure because it didn't seem right. She got a reading off the roof. She told me to gather the kids and get home on the couch NOW! It helped a bit but was still a bit high at my next dr appt. The dr started really pushing the induction. I talked her out of it as long as I promised to put myself on bedrest.


Tuesday after Labor Day I had my next appt. It was early so that there was time to be admitted and an induction started. She examined me and told me I was 2cm and 50% effaced. I agreed to head to the hospital for an induction. It was about 1'ish when I was hooked up and the pit was started. Nothing happened all day. About 9pm Dr T (same OB who delivered Luke) came in and suggested we stop the pit for the night. She explained I was till thick and closed and hadn't progressed at all since being admitted. I was livid...thick and closed!?!?! I was told I was 2cm and 50% effaced! It was the only reason why I agreed to come here today.

Dr T responds with...that's ok I was told you were 3cm, 75% effaced and your blood pressure was high (it was fine!) Seems they'd told my regular OB that they were full and unless it was necessary they didn't have room for me. So it seems she told us what we wanted to hear. After doing the inital exam after admitting me, Dr T thought since I'd already had so many kids all I needed was a little pit. I replied with...if anyone had bothered to ask me (or tell me the truth) I'd have told them it was useless unless my cervix was ripe!

We decided to turn off the pit and do cervidil (or something similar) applications every 4hrs. What a pain. I had to lay flat in bed while we were doing it. I was allowed to get up to go to the bathroom and walk around for a few minutes before the next application. About 6am I felt my first contraction. :o) I'd sent Tom home after midnight to get some rest. I called Tom and told him to come up as soon as he could. It was the first day of school so he had to get the 3 oldest kids on the bus. BIL was staying with the kids who weren't in school.

The pit was hooked up about 9'ish and the contractions picked up quickly. We were all joking and taking bets whether the baby would be born before or after lunch. I picked after, Dr T picked before. Shortly after 1 the nurse was in checking things. She watched me through a contraction and said she was going to get the doctor. What an angel! By the time the dr got there I was feeling ready to push. They broke down the bed while I reported that I could feel the baby coming down. It was an uneventful, 2 small pushs delivery.

Joke Jakey style

I came home the other day to the kids all trying to tell me a joke that Jake made up while I was gone. It's one of those times when you try really hard not to laugh but can't help but end up ROFL'ing.

It started off that that Liz had said "A!" (meaning Ass)

Someone says....Awwww! I'm telling mom you said A!

She starts reciting the alphabet....B...C...D...E...F...G and says...

THERE! Now you can tell mom I said A through G.

Jake immediately shouts out...Well you can tell mom I said F to U!

We survived!

The first day of school has come and gone. Everyone got out the door when they needed to. I still have a few things to get for them but all in all we're good. Olivia tried to stay home this morning...her belly hurt. I made her go. I hope she doesn't try this too much this year. I don't really have negotiating and cajoling time in the morning.

Pat went with me to drop off Michelle. We ran to the dollar store and while there I started getting a headache. I realized I never had any coffee before we left. At the same time we both said...DUNKIN DONUTS! We shared an XL cappuccino and 2 donuts.

It was a bit too early to go grocery shopping so we decided to kill some time at the pet store. As were we getting out of the van I realized I didn't have my diaper bag. I'd left it at Dunkin Donuts!!! WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME!?!?! How come I've been losing/leaving my wallet/bag everywhere!?! Normally I'd have to have my bag to leave since my keys would be in it. This time was different because I was letting Pat drive so he had the keys in his pocket. We ran back to DD and luckily they'd seen us walk out and put it behind the counter. PHEW! We went back to the pet store and oogled the animals for a while. Danielle really enjoyed it.

Shortly after we got there Jess called Pat and said she was almost out of class (Michelle still had 3hrs to go). He told her to meet us at the pet store when she was done. She called back about 10mins later. Seems her exhaust pipe had fallen off and was hanging under her car. We jumped in the van, drove up to the college and Pat wired it up. Now we had to find a muffler place. One place gave her a $200 estimate which her dad and I told her was too much. About half an hour later we found where we wanted to be and they had a $140 estimate in hand. I left them at the shop and headed out to do my errands.

I stopped at Wendy's (which I will NOT being doing on a regular basis!) ordered a jr bacon and side salad for me, and a sm fries for Danielle who had fallen asleep. So I sat in Walmart parking lot and enjoyed my lunch while she slept. After she woke up and had a few fries we headed in to shop. We have a nasty cold with a cough going around here so I needed some meds. I felt like people were thinking I was a drug dealer/manufacturer with all the different types of cold meds I was picking up. Damn you backwoods meth labs for turning innocent homemakers into suspects!

My phone rang as I was starting into the grocery area of WM. It was Pat telling me that they were still waiting for the car to be fixed. Hmmm I thought they told them it wouldn't be long. Next thing I know he's RAAAA'ing me. What a jokster. Just as we were finishing up Michelle called to be picked up. So much for not knowing how to kill time while she was in class. I hadn't finished my errands so I dragged her along for another hour.

We got home at 4:30 which is prime afterschool crazy time. Being the first day of school EVERYONE had papers for me to fill out. So like a good girl I did my homework. Then I finished putting groceries away and started dinner. I want dinner to be ready to serve by 6:30 on school nights, it was 7. I have some work to do. I'm thinking of starting to use my crockpot more. One small problem is my 18qt slowcooker/roaster is too big for a meal and the 4qt is a tad too small. I can use it to make sauces or parts of meals I guess. Maybe Monday I'll hit the thrift stores and see if I can find another 4qt or larger one.

We're in the middle of switching some rooms around here. That means tons of things out of place, tons of things that have no place to be put, bags of stuff that no one wants anymore and a huge pile of clothes that seem to have gotten dirty without being worn and need to be washed. I can't wait until it's all taken care of! This place is a disaster area right now. At least my front coat closet is clean and organized! (did it last weekend) Unfortunately I found out just how small it is....it can't even hold 12 winter coats much less enough winter and spring ones for everyone...NOT TOK friendly!

Today is Carrie's 12th birthday (will write out her birth story later). It means she can now join the youth group at church. She's been bugging me, trying to get me to send her to the meetings early. Big bad mom wouldn't break the rules. I hope it's as exciting as she thinks it's going to be. lol She wanted chinese for dinner so we're ordering sesame chicken. I'm making lo mein here so there'll be something filling to go along with it.

Bus is here. Time to see if everyone survived another day.

We survived!

The first day of school has come and gone. Everyone got out the door when they needed to. I still have a few things to get for them but all in all we're good. Olivia tried to stay home this morning...her belly hurt. I made her go. I hope she doesn't try this too much this year. I don't really have negotiating and cajoling time in the morning.

Pat went with me to drop off Michelle. We ran to the dollar store and while there I started getting a headache. I realized I never had any coffee before we left. At the same time we both said...DUNKIN DONUTS! We shared an XL cappuccino and 2 donuts.

It was a bit too early to go grocery shopping so we decided to kill some time at the pet store. As were we getting out of the van I realized I didn't have my diaper bag. I'd left it at Dunkin Donuts!!! WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME!?!?! How come I've been losing/leaving my wallet/bag everywhere!?! Normally I'd have to have my bag to leave since my keys would be in it. This time was different because I was letting Pat drive so he had the keys in his pocket. We ran back to DD and luckily they'd seen us walk out and put it behind the counter. PHEW! We went back to the pet store and oogled the animals for a while. Danielle really enjoyed it.

Shortly after we got there Jess called Pat and said she was almost out of class (Michelle still had 3hrs to go). He told her to meet us at the pet store when she was done. She called back about 10mins later. Seems her exhaust pipe had fallen off and was hanging under her car. We jumped in the van, drove up to the college and Pat wired it up. Now we had to find a muffler place. One place gave her a $200 estimate which her dad and I told her was too much. About half an hour later we found where we wanted to be and they had a $140 estimate in hand. I left them at the shop and headed out to do my errands.

I stopped at Wendy's (which I will NOT being doing on a regular basis!) ordered a jr bacon and side salad for me, and a sm fries for Danielle who had fallen asleep. So I sat in Walmart parking lot and enjoyed my lunch while she slept. After she woke up and had a few fries we headed in to shop. We have a nasty cold with a cough going around here so I needed some meds. I felt like people were thinking I was a drug dealer/manufacturer with all the different types of cold meds I was picking up. Damn you backwoods meth labs for turning innocent homemakers into suspects!

My phone rang as I was starting into the grocery area of WM. It was Pat telling me that they were still waiting for the car to be fixed. Hmmm I thought they told them it wouldn't be long. Next thing I know he's RAAAA'ing me. What a jokster. Just as we were finishing up Michelle called to be picked up. So much for not knowing how to kill time while she was in class. I hadn't finished my errands so I dragged her along for another hour.

We got home at 4:30 which is prime afterschool crazy time. Being the first day of school EVERYONE had papers for me to fill out. So like a good girl I did my homework. Then I finished putting groceries away and started dinner. I want dinner to be ready to serve by 6:30 on school nights, it was 7. I have some work to do. I'm thinking of starting to use my crockpot more. One small problem is my 18qt slowcooker/roaster is too big for a meal and the 4qt is a tad too small. I can use it to make sauces or parts of meals I guess. Maybe Monday I'll hit the thrift stores and see if I can find another 4qt or larger one.

We're in the middle of switching some rooms around here. That means tons of things out of place, tons of things that have no place to be put, bags of stuff that no one wants anymore and a huge pile of clothes that seem to have gotten dirty without being worn and need to be washed. I can't wait until it's all taken care of! This place is a disaster area right now. At least my front coat closet is clean and organized! (did it last weekend) Unfortunately I found out just how small it is....it can't even hold 12 winter coats much less enough winter and spring ones for everyone...NOT TOK friendly!

Today is Carrie's 12th birthday (will write out her birth story later). It means she can now join the youth group at church. She's been bugging me, trying to get me to send her to the meetings early. Big bad mom wouldn't break the rules. I hope it's as exciting as she thinks it's going to be. lol She wanted chinese for dinner so we're ordering sesame chicken. I'm making lo mein here so there'll be something filling to go along with it.

Bus is here. Time to see if everyone survived another day.

Tuesday, September 05, 2006

Thank you everyone

I really appreciate everyone's messages during this rollercoaster of a week. Things are slowly getting better emotionally. I know it won't ever go away (this is my 2nd m/c) but it does get better. I also know it'll hit me again when I least expect it. At least it did last time. Things have been really busy here, which helps a bit.

One thing about all this that I can consider good and even a gift to me. Becoming pg caused me to take stock in my health again. While my sugar levels probably were ok before I became pg, I wasn't eating right and the weight wasn't coming off like it should've. Actually I've gained some weight back since the end of last year. I'd gotten lax about taking my blood pressure meds so I know my pressure was high with our without the pg. I hadn't started ANY exericse at all. I'm taking all this as a sign that I'm to put my health up higher in my priorities. Time to take better care of myself! Plus when/if I become pr again it can go well right from the start!

Today is the last day of summer vacation. As usual I'm pretty sad to see it end. I LOVE the unstructured summertime. This year is looking to need me to be the most organized ever. Tom and the kids are going out the door at all hours between 6 and 10am, and never the same time each day. Not only are they going out but I am too, since I have to drive and pickup Michelle.

On top of getting the house ready (which will NEVER happen) I'm also trying to get myself ready. Some days Michelle needs to leave the house just as or before the bus gets here for the youngest group of kids. I'm not sure how that'll work out at all. Whether they'll still be here to catch the bus or I'll have to drop them off after I drop off Michelle. Then there's the time problem. Will I be able to do all that before the school day actually starts?

One of my problems is Michelle perpetually runs late. I told her to hurry up this morning and she replied with...I have tons of time (she had 30 mins and was still wrapped in a towel). She was out the door late, luckily no young kids/bus to deal with. I told her ALL I'm asking of her is that she be on time...waiting at the door at 8:30...not almost out the door at 8:30.

To make things better this morning I get in the van and see my gastank read E! GRRRRRR DREEEEEEEW!!!! He borrowed the van this weekend so his band could drive to a gig. He was SUPPOSE to replace the gas before he brought it home. I ran back into the house, grabbed my bank card, dropped off Michelle and stopped at the gas station. With school shopping things are TIGHT financially this payperiod, wouldn't you know it, my bankcard was declined. One of the benefits of small town living...the gas station attendant knew me and allowed me to leave without paying for it. I ran home, jumped online, transfered a few dollars and ran back to the gas station. 2nd try did the trick and my card was accepted. PHEW! Drew's already been given a piece of my mind. Betcha he was wishing he didn't have a cell phone right about now. lol

I am managing to get a bunch of things done around here. (actually I'm suppose to be working now instead of blogging but a girl's gotta stop for coffee once in a while lol) I've hung coathooks in the doorway of the livingroom coatcloset for bookbags. The closet is one of my few regrets when planning/building this house. It's TINY! It can't hold 12 winter coats in it much less spring AND winter things. It's one of the few things I wish I could redo about this house, along with a 1st floor laundryroom. What we really need is a huge mudroom with tons of hooks and cubbies or lockers.

I've been a lean mean laundry machine. I'm trying to catchup from not having my hands free for the last 2wks (filled with cranky Danielle). Add in bedrooms and laundryroom floor being cleaned and you have TONS of laundry waiting. I can't begin to explain it. Actually I'd be too embarrassed to even try. Let's just say if I ever see the end of these piles...you'll hear me celebrating whereever you are. :o)

Part of my organizing is trying to figure out things for quick take along breakfasts and lunches. I'm not going to be home from 10 to 4 on Monday and Wednesday so have to figure out quick or make ahead dinners for those days too. You'd think I had this all down pat by now. Have to get it planned out today so I can hit the grocery store tomorrow while waiting for Michelle to get out of class.

Well guess my break is over. Kids seem to think if mom's rear is in a chair all work can end. What I wouldn't do for a megaphone and bullwhip right about now! ;o)

Saturday, September 02, 2006

Hard news to break

My worst fear has come true. Friday morning I started to miscarry. It was a sad, slow, hard day. When I first saw the blood I had a bit of hope that it might be just a fluke. Within an hour I was pretty sure it was a done deal. Tom called home about 15mins after I was sure and I told him. He sounded upset and shaken and tried to console me. He mentioned a few comments people at work made when they heard I was pg. I hope they are more sensitive toward him when they hear I'm not anymore. I can imagine the callous things that they say to him. It makes me mad. If this was a first or second pregnancy there'd be plenty of sympathy. I'm a bit afraid that Tom will decide this means his decision to be less cautious was wrong. I hope not. This isn't how I want my childbearing years to end!

After talking to Tom I had to run Michelle and Val to a friend's house. When I got home I told the rest of the kids that were here. Eileen and Olivia were the hardest to deal with. They were full of lots of questions. How did I know the baby died? What if it didn't? Am I sure? But what if... those were the hardest to deal with. The ones that were looking for hope. The poor kids didn't know what to do or say all day when I'd suddenly break into tears.

What I wanted to do the most was call Tom and ask him to come home from work early. I just wanted him here. I never did BUT he came home on his own about 1:30. :o) While working in the kitchen I suggested that he might consider taking off Tues and Wed so he'd have a loooong weekend. His reply...I can't. I have to save it for when the....oops. :o( I know how he feels. Eileen was cleaning her room and brought me one of Danielle's fleece booties from last winter. I said to myself...Oh I have to save this for the new baby...

I'd planned on getting a lot of work (mostly laundry) done. While I got some done it wasn't nearly enough. In the evening I felt claustraphobic so headed out into the backyard. I spied the rake and attacked the lawn. We raked up 6 lawncarts full of grass. I have a tiny blister on my thumb because of it but it felt good to work so hard!

Saturday morning I woke up early with plans to get all the work done that I wanted to do on Friday. I immediately went into the basement to do laundry. Before I could fold half the load in the dryer, Danielle had woken up and was crying. She's been a klingon and nursing constantly since. I don't really know WHY she's doing this but oh well. Part of me doesn't want to deal with her. Ontop of wanting to be selfish and just deal with ME. I've had her 24/7 for TWO weeks solid!!! I need a break.

My BIL's been out here since last night. Tom just came in to let me know BIL's paying for us to order pizza and wings. I could hug him! I really wasn't looking forward to grilling porkchops in the rain. They're ordered and Tom's on his way to pick them up. Guess I should go get things ready for dinner that I don't have to make! :o)