Sunday, March 15, 2009

The desire for order

What do I do at 2:30 in the morning? I can't stay in tossing and turning disturbs those trying to sleep. I can't really move around the'll wake everyone. That crosses...exercise, clean or have fun off the list. It's a little too early for coffee, although a bowl of cereal is probably ok. Well I guess it's a good thing Sean is a light sleeper, I can sit and nurse him back to sleep and cuddle for an hour while I surf the net. Now he's back in bed...hopefully for a few hours.

I'm not really sure how early I got up...I don't have a clock on my side of the bed and I can't see Tom's. All I know is that I was tossing and turning and nursing Sean for quite a while in bed and it was 3:13 when I finally managed to come out here. It's going to be a looong day!

It's our last day before "normal" sets in again. Whatever the new normal is. I think I've said it before...I have a desire to have order in everything lately. I see it in Tom a lot. He's constantly going over and over what needs to be done with Billy's things, what projects he needs to finish outside. Me, I want everything to be clean although I don't necessarily want to do the actual work it would require. Even when I do want to, the kids have other plans for me. I want to live healthier and get back to frugal ways.

It doesn't help that I stepped on the scale and found myself at an all time new high. Or that things are tight and I'd like them not to be anymore. I don't even really want to have extra spending money. I'd just like to know that I don't have to juggle things every payday. To make a final decision on whether we should refinance everything or not and if much and for how long so I can stop thinking about it. But then what would I think about?

I bought a bunch of crochet thread at the dollar store the other day. Just what I need, I have so many unfinished projects around here already. I've been thinking a lot the last few weeks that I'd like to make most of the gifts for Christmas this year. That means I'll have to start projects now. Actually I should be getting LAST Christmas' projects done first. LOL The other day I did manage to find the new rotary cutter that was lost not too long ago. It was in a container in plain view, well if I looked inside the container. But the container was right ontop of the computer desk. Watch I won't be able to find the cutting mat or the fleece blankets now.

And then I dozed off at the keyboard and went back to bed for an hour or so. After that the kids were awake and got on the computer. I never touched the keyboard after that.

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