Friday, March 12, 2010

Can I just crawl back in my bed please?

Oh it's one of those days. Not one specific thing is getting to me, just a bunch of little itty bitty ones. Mind racing with a todo list a mile long before my eyes open, major messes in my face before I even get out of bed, everything and everyone calling for my attention at once, taking one step forward and 5 steps back. Then there's the emotional stuff...missing Billy and my inlaws, Tom's uncle passing, missing Liz, Val, us verus them situation that I'm seriously trying to avoid.

So I can sit here and wallow or I can look around again. There's Danielle sitting on my lap, arms wrapped around my neck, squeezing hard. She told me...I hugged you so you would be better. Wiping my tears. Then sniffing me she says....Mommy, you smell so good!...and she sniffs some more. lol Sean who's dancing around here singing a song without a care in the world other then to convince me I want to sit down for a few minutes so he can nurse and snuggle. The big hairy kid...all clean and fluffy, nuzzling me for some pets, head in my lap with a huge sigh, ready for the luvin' to start.

Then there's the stuff I can't see right now. A friend on the phone who's willing to listen and talk about things. :oD Little girls in school who'd love to be home instead. A fine looking husband hard at work for us, even if he'd rather be outside playing in the mud. A grandbaby on the way and two weddings to plan. An income coming into the house and our bills up to date. A nice, adequate in size, sturdy house around me...we just won't look down for now...what we can't see won't hurt us. Well, maybe we should look down, this stuff can hurt us if we step just right. But for the moment I have it on /ignore. A working vehicle (and maybe SOON TWO of them!!) to get us where we need or want to go. A full tank of propane...without me needing to call for a refill...woohhooo! Plenty of ingredients for good food. Longer days and more sunshine ahead.

PHEW!!! Feeling better all ready! Now I need to take the bull by the horns and just do what I need to do. Today is Michelle's day off so no driving for me. I think I'll ignore everything else and get my bedroom taken care of. If I can at least get rid of the chaos I wake up to in there every morning I think things will start off better each day. Plus it'll give Tom and I a place where we can connect more. Right now it's just a place where we sleep.

Ok...can't get to work while my butt is in this chair (as comfy as it is). Off I go!!!!

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