Friday, July 25, 2008

The end of an era

Call me lazy but I can't help it...I'm cross posting what I wrote on my blog over at the LFN (Large Family in the bar above). I tried to come up with something different but it didn't seem right. So here it is with lots of pictures.

I know I've thought it before with Olivia (who was suppose to be our last one). This time though it's for real. I am officially done with babies of my own :o( (grandbabies are another thing and not too far into the future). Sean turns 1yo today, rolling off the infant stage and crawling into the toddler arena.

I'm excited about what's ahead for him. I love to see him explore, learn and mature. It seems like he's drinking in things at an unbelieveable rate. I can't take the smile off my face as I watch him. And watch him I do since he hardly sleeps. I'm always saying it's a good thing he's the smartest and cutest baby in the whole wide world! Otherwise I'd have sent him back a looong time ago!

I'm trying to grab hold of and keep each moment with him. Not because he's my last, but because he's mine. This time is so short, before I know it, it'll all be gone. He'll have places to go, things to do and people to see. He won't believe it when I remind him that he needed me to hold him 24/7, even as he slept. That he was too cautious to take his first step even though he could do it no problem. Yet he could climb to the top of matter how high, without an ounce of caution. Hanging off the side or teetering on the edge with me on the verge of a heart attack.

While part of me wants to look back and think of what I'll be missing. A larger part of me is looking forward to what is ahead of us...the adventures, the happy times, the heartaches, the mistakes. Things that would seem to break us but make us stronger. Things that you wish you could live without but know you can't. Things you wish you could live with forever but are fleeting.

Life's continual motion and energy...I remember there being times when I've can it go on? Like after the deaths of my in laws or Carrie's cancer diagnosis. I thought...How can these people keep going like everything is the same? Why can't everything just stop and let me catch up? It's THAT push to go on and never stop that makes us get through those tough times. Life is good!



noelle said...

Thanks for sharing your little man's birthday. I feel like you. My little one is potty trained and such a big guy. I miss having a baby, but it's really nice to have big kids too.

NannyOgg said...

Happy birtday, Sean!

Beautiful post. With Sylvia being my last one, I go through a lot of the same emotions, both a bit sad, but so much reveling at the same time.

Life indeed is very good!


Lisa said...

Happy Birthday Sean! I know exactly what you mean. Addie is coming up on her 1st birthday next month. That looking back and forward thing is the essence of this whole parent gig. Great writing.